Year of the Snake: Finding Resilience

Nine acts of resistance that can help you build mental resilience.

As a former cult kid, I am no stranger to dealing with the feelings of being outnumbered by people who's ideology is inherently an act of violence against my very existence.  So here are nine acts of resistance from someone with experience that can help you build mental resilience when faced with situations that are ultimately outside of your immediate control.  Please know that none of these are easy, but they are immediately actionable, and they will make a difference in continuing to find hope.

Survive. 

Remember that your very existence is an act of resistance.  We speak a lot about the importance of self care, but fail to recognize that sometimes even just making it through the day takes everything we have.  It is okay if all you did today was survive.  Even if that survival is not ideal.  Even if you are exhausted, even if you feel like you failed at every basic care task.  That's enough.  Honor your mind, your body, and your heart for doing the best that it can do and be gentle with yourself.

Stay safe. 

Protect yourself and your family first.  Be silent if you have to. Retreat quietly from spaces you are unsafe in.  Delete social media posts or anything that may make you a target.  Choose when to speak and when not to with wisdom.  There is a myth amongst the aggrieved that social justice requires you to always be loud.  But some of us cannot afford to draw attention to ourselves.  Not all of us have the kind of protection that takes.  Not all of us have the emotional or mental capacity to be in the middle.  And that is a good thing.  Resistance requires many types of actions, and the entire point that we are trying to fight for is that the diversity of human experience is what makes us stronger.  If you need to step back, do it.

Find your center and remain calm. 

Being overwhelmed and in a heightened emotional state is exhausting, and that's the point.  Remaining calm is not about ignoring the things that are happening around us.  It's about learning to take a breath and let the initial fear, anger, and sorrow become something that feeds us rather than drowns us.  When we learn to remain in that center space of our minds, the calm in the middle of the storm of emotions, we can view things from a much more balanced perspective, and most importantly, react with foresight rather than panic.  This is how we turn the matchstick of anger at a specific injustice into a bonfire of rage that can be sustained over time.  Stay angry, but do so with intention.

Learn something new. 

There is a reason education is one of the things they want to prevent you from having access to.  Find a topic or skill that interests you, and learn about it.  Take advantage of free resources like your local library (many of which have online ebook loan programs!) and consume knowledge to your hearts content.  Do you like ocean animals? Learn about them.  Do you like building things? Get some scrap wood and some nails and see what happens. Do you like bees? See if there's an apiary near you.  Take a walk in the woods and start learning about the plants you see.  Binge watch documentaries about fashion history.  Learn how chocolate is made.  It does not matter what it is, just learn something.  Not only does this help preserve knowledge, it also gives you something else to focus on so that you are not overwhelmed by consuming news every waking moment.

Continue to create. 

Art is more important now than ever, and it does not matter what that art looks like.  The act of creation is in of itself an act of resistance against tyranny.  Art is a language.  It allows us to speak of things we can we cannot fully express with words.  It does not have to make sense to anyone else, it does not have to be beautiful, it does not even have to be technically skilled.  Throw paint at a canvas, smash a bunch of colors of clay together, stab holes into a piece of cardboard and see what shapes the shadows make.  Just make art.

Support Artists and Small Creatives Financially. 

Yes, that includes those of us who are artists who feel icky about having to market ourselves.  Keeping your income is an act of resistance.  It is not selfish or silly to be asking for financial support right now.  Small businesses are dying.  It's no secret that it is harder than ever for us right now.  Get over the idea that showing up with what you have to offer is unsavory.  We all know that money is a powerful tool, and people want to support you.  And if you are on the other end of that spectrum, do not feel guilty if you cannot contribute directly to artists financially.  There are a variety of ways you can help small businesses make money without actually spending yours! Do they have a Youtube channel? Go watch a video. Share their products or art with people you know will appreciate it.  Help their websites show up better in search engines by searching for a product or service you know they have and then clicking their shop links (NOT sponsored links!) Have a little bit of money to spend but can't afford anything in the shop or just don't need anything they offer? See if they have a patreon or kofi.  Ask if you can send a donation if they don't.  Trust me when I say that even $1 makes a difference.

Get to know your local community. 

while I will never be one to disparage the importance and validity of online communities, getting involved in the community around you is just as important.  Go to your local library and see what programs they have upcoming.  Visit your local markets and businesses.  You don't have to spend money to just be present.  So many of us live in areas where we feel isolated and alone, and that is the point.  I guarantee there are more like-minded people in your local community than you realize, and we are going to need each other.  You don't have to be loud or flashy about it.  Just show up.

Be ruthlessly kind. 

Kindness is a weapon. You don't have to be nice to be kind.  You don't have to smile or be polite or swallow your tongue.  Being kind is an intentional act of standing up in the face of cruelty.  Kill them with kindness.  The less you refuse to allow cruelty and hate to determine your actions, the less justification they have to treat you with cruelty.  It is hard to hate someone who is kind to you, especially when you know they are being kind despite not liking you as a person. 
 

Understand that other people are not the enemy. 

This is perhaps the hardest thing on this list, and I would bet that many of you had an intense reaction to reading that.  Take a breath because I'm going to say it again.  Other people are not your enemy.  When dealing with the kinds of blind faith ideology that is present in our world right now, it is so easy to want to blame the individuals around us who we see as responsible.  Understand that they are both a victim and a weapon of this system.  To be very clear, this is not about forgiveness.  This is not about being nice to them or allowing them into your space.  This is not even about pity.  This is about control.  When we learn to see the individuals of a system as what they are, we stop allowing them to have control over us.  And I do not mean the individuals at the top who actually have the power.  I mean the ones we deal with on a day to day basis.  They are as much a victim of this system as we are, even though they cannot see it.  And they are also a weapon.  By keeping us engaged with useless pawns, keeping us angry and enraged at people who have no more power than we do, they keep us from the tasks that will actually matter.  Do not waste your time or energy on people who are prisoners of their own hatred.  Treat them as what they are.  A waste of time. In doing so you will realize that they have no power over you.  Instead, focus your time and energy on the things that DO matter, and the people who DO have power.

This isn't the first time they have tried to shove us down.  History has shown that no matter how many times they try, they will never win.  No matter how loud they are, no matter how cruel they are.  Because we are resilient and we will continue to be so.  The things that keep us strong are the things they cannot take from us.  Remember that.